If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
this will be a night to untag.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize
