the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done