Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(954): View more from Florida

What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?

(904): View more from Florida

Both

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.

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(763): View more from Minnesota

I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me

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(757): View more from Virginia

ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.

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These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
Read it at the TFLN blog
(508): View more from Massachusetts

Since when do you wear a bracelet?

(603): View more from New Hampshire

Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs

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(713): View more from Texas

If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.

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(604): View more from British Columbia

mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.

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(631): View more from New York

when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.

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(613): View more from Ontario

Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.

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