The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Randomize
