Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
