I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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