we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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