Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
