so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
home. puking in laundry basket.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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