She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
