"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
