I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
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I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
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You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
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