Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize
