Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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