omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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