I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Randomize