Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Randomize
