nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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