I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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