I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
