i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
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