i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
