what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Floor bacon is actually really good
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize