I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
