my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
