hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Randomize
