theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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