HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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