did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
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