I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
i may or may not be watching the land before time
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
