don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Randomize
