You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
