We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
