8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
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