i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
my sisters under your porch take her home
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize