S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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