You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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