...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
