i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize