Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
