You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
