FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
