you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
