I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Randomize
