Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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