he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
