This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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