Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
