i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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