This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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