I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I cannot find my penis.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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