I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
