i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.